Posts Tagged ‘feeling love for self’

Episode 63: Why You Don’t Look in a Full-Length Mirror – and Why You Should

Tuesday, March 14th, 2017

Episode 63: Why You Don’t Look in a Full-Length Mirror – and Why You Should

Do you own a full-length mirror? If you do, do you actually use it?

If you have extra weight you wish you didn’t have, I’ll bet you avoid seeing the reality of how your body looks right now.

Full-Length Mirror podcast 63

When your vision of yourself is a bit fuzzy, you know that you’re not where you want to be, but you may avoid seeing exactly how off track you’ve gotten.

Then one day, you may be shopping for clothes, and may be unable to avoid a mirror. Full-length.

And that is when your reality meets your vision in your head and everything busts loose. Figuratively speaking, of course.

I want you to be able to see yourself no matter what you weigh.

Seeing and even accepting your body today is the key to a different body in the future. I promise.

Let me coach you and show you how to deal with how you look. All of you.

Talk with Cookie

Make sure you get your FREE copy of my BOOK, Clearing Your Path to Permanent Weight Loss, plus other gifts. Get them here: http://weightlossmadereal.com/gifts

THE FREEDOM COACHING GROUP: If you’ve ever dreamed about having your own personal coach to work on your eating with you, you’re closer than you think. My coaching group is happening now! It’s super affordable, supportive, and an amazing resource if you struggle with overeating, emotional eating or binge eating. Take all you’re learning here on the podcast and go to the next level. Click here: http://weightlossmadereal.com/group to get all the details and join our group Weight Loss Made Real: The Freedom Group. Because really, isn’t freedom what we all want? I hope to see you in the group!

I always welcome your letters. You may email me at cookie@realweightlossrealwomen.com

I’d so appreciate it if you would leave me an honest rating and review on iTunes at http://realweightlossrealwomen.com/itunes. It will help the show and its ranking in iTunes a lot! How to rate and review on iTunes: http://realweightlossrealwomen.com/rate. Thank you and enjoy the show!

Episode 60: Making a Plan for Self-Care — How to Do It

Tuesday, February 21st, 2017

Episode 60: Making a Plan for Self-Care — How to Do It

How well do you take care of yourself? If you’re like many women, you don’t do any self-care until something comes to a crisis point.

Self-care podcast 60

If you are ready to take your weight loss and eating issues to the next level, it’s time to talk with me. Visit http://www.weightlossmadereal.com/talk for a free consultation with Cookie and find out if private coaching is the solution to your struggle.

You neglect your body until one day you wake up and don’t know how you got here.

You may neglect your health until some symptom nags at you and won’t go away.

And your emotional health is no different. You need to take care of you. There is no way around it.

Here’s how we’re going to do that. Get my LOVE Menu worksheet right here.

I want to show you how to figure out what you need. And stop resenting that you are in charge of meeting those needs. Then, I’ll help you create a menu of things you can do as needed so you feel good on a pretty regular basis.

Ready? Let’s dive into creating your self-care plan.

Make sure you get your FREE copy of my BOOK, Clearing Your Path to Permanent Weight Loss, plus other gifts. Get them here: http://weightlossmadereal.com/gifts

THE FREEDOM COACHING GROUP: If you’ve ever dreamed about having your own personal coach to work on your eating with you, you’re closer than you think. My coaching group is happening now! It’s super affordable, supportive, and an amazing resource if you struggle with overeating, emotional eating or binge eating. Take all you’re learning here on the podcast and go to the next level. Click here: http://weightlossmadereal.com/group to get all the details and join our group Weight Loss Made Real: The Freedom Group. Because really, isn’t freedom what we all want? I hope to see you in the group!

I always welcome your letters. You may email me at cookie@realweightlossrealwomen.com

I’d so appreciate it if you would leave me an honest rating and review on iTunes at http://realweightlossrealwomen.com/itunes. It will help the show and its ranking in iTunes a lot! How to rate and review on iTunes: http://realweightlossrealwomen.com/rate. Thank you and enjoy the show!

Episode 48: Tough Love: You Are Not Your Weight!

Tuesday, November 29th, 2016

Episode 48: Tough Love: You Are Not Your Weight!

Join me today for a tough love session.

You are not your weight podcast 48

I want you to know how small your weight is in the big picture of you. Of who you really are.

I know how much you worry about the number on the scale. And I know how you think you’ll be happy someday… when the scale tells you it’s okay.

Enough!

I will show you how to think about your weight and be happy right now. If you learn how to be happy no matter what your weight is right now, then your weight loss journey will be so much easier.

And here’s the thing:

There are so many more important and interesting things about you… much more compelling than what you weigh.

Join me and allow yourself to see things in a different way. Together we can do this.

Make sure you get your FREE copy of my BOOK, Clearing Your Path to Permanent Weight Loss, plus other gifts. Get them here: http://weightlossmadereal.com/gifts

If you are ready to take your weight loss and eating issues to the next level, it’s time to talk with me. Visit http://www.weightlossmadereal.com/talk for a free consultation with Cookie and find out if coaching is the solution to your struggle.

THE FREEDOM COACHING GROUP: If you’ve ever dreamed about having your own personal coach to work on your eating with you, you’re closer than you think. My coaching group is happening now! It’s super affordable, supportive, and an amazing resource if you struggle with overeating, emotional eating or binge eating. Take all you’re learning here on the podcast and go to the next level. Click here: http://weightlossmadereal.com/group to get all the details and join our group Weight Loss Made Real: The Freedom Group. Because really, isn’t freedom what we all want? I hope to see you in the group!

I always welcome your letters. You may email me at cookie@realweightlossrealwomen.com

I’d so appreciate it if you would leave me an honest rating and review on iTunes at http://realweightlossrealwomen.com/itunes. It will help the show and its ranking in iTunes a lot! How to rate and review on iTunes: http://realweightlossrealwomen.com/rate. Thank you and enjoy the show!

Ep 19 Weight Loss and Self-Esteem: Your Self-Image and Your Self-Esteem and How They Affect Everything!

Tuesday, May 10th, 2016

Episode 19: Weight Loss and Self-Esteem: Your Self-Image and Your Self-Esteem and How They Affect Everything!

Self-Esteem Podcast 19

We all talk about self-esteem and self-image. We have a vague idea that these concepts play into how we feel about ourselves.

But do we really know what they mean?

Here’s the scoop about how your self-image and your self-esteem affect your eating and your weight.

Here’s what we’ll talk about:

  • If you had a less than perfect childhood, (who didn’t?) how does this impact how you live your life today?
  • Why you think highly of yourself. Or negatively.
  • How to see the connection between your self-image and so many areas of your life.
  • Why it’s simple but not easy to change your view of yourself.
  • How your self-image shows up in how you take care of yourself. Or how you don’t!
  • Did you think self-esteem was fixed? And unchangeable? It’s not, and here’s why.
  • Exactly how to change your view of who you are in the world.
  • How to rewrite your story about yourself and create a new direction for your future.
  • Finally understand why it’s been so hard to reach your goals in all areas.

Once you learn where your self-image and self-esteem come from, you’ll be able to look at yourself in a new way: with compassion and hope. And you’ll be able to stop thinking that things just are the way they are. Change is totally possible!

THE FREEDOM COACHING GROUP: If you’ve ever dreamed about having your own personal coach to work on your eating with you, you’re closer than you think. My coaching group is happening now! It’s super affordable, supportive, and an amazing resource if you struggle with overeating, emotional eating or binge eating. Take all you’re learning here on the podcast and go to the next level. Click here: http://weightlossmadereal.com/group to get all the details and join our group Weight Loss Made Real: The Freedom Group. Because really, isn’t freedom what we all want? I hope to see you in the group!

Make sure you get your FREE copy of my BOOK, Clearing Your Path to Permanent Weight Loss. Get it here: http://www.weightlossmadereal.com/book

If you are ready to take your weight loss and eating issues to the next level, it’s time to talk with me. Visit http://www.weightlossmadereal.com/talk for a free consultation with Cookie and find out if coaching is the solution to your struggle.

I’d so appreciate it if you would leave me an honest rating and review on iTunes at http://realweightlossrealwomen.com/itunes. It will help the show and its ranking in iTunes a lot! How to rate and review on iTunes: http://realweightlossrealwomen.com/rate. Thank you and enjoy the show!

Ep 14 You Need to Stop Hating Yourself in Order to Lose Your Extra Weight

Tuesday, April 5th, 2016

Episode 14: You Need to Stop Hating Yourself in Order to Lose Your Extra Weight

Stop Hating Yourself Podcast 14

You want to lose weight. You want to stop your bingeing. And you definitely want to stop eating emotionally.

But wait, before you can do those things, there is one thing you MUST do.

And that is to stop the hating, the bashing and the name calling.

THE FREEDOM COACHING GROUP: If you’ve ever dreamed about having your own personal coach to work on your eating with you, you’re closer than you think. My coaching group is happening now! It’s super affordable, supportive, and an amazing resource if you struggle with overeating, emotional eating or binge eating. Take all you’re learning here on the podcast and go to the next level. Click here: http://weightlossmadereal.com/group to get all the details and join our group Weight Loss Made Real: The Freedom Group. Because really, isn’t freedom what we all want? I hope to see you in the group!

That’s right! I’m talking to you, about those secret, internal conversations you have with yourself that leave you feeling terrible.

And they make it impossible for you to take constructive steps to change the way you eat.

Are you with me? Here’s our coaching conversation about how to stop hating yourself so you can move on and do what you most desire:

  • How does your self-hate show up? What does it sound like for you?
  • Why do you do it when it feels so bad?
  • What’s the big deal if you talk not-so-nicely to yourself?
  • If you need to feel better so you can do better, how exactly do you do this?
  • What if your negative thoughts about yourself keep on coming?
  • Do you think you’ll feel better AFTER you lose the weight?
  • Why do the hateful thoughts about yourself feel so real?

Changing how you feel about yourself at your current weight, with your current eating habits is something you can do. Definitely. 100%.

Trying to make changes while hating your weight and your body and the way you eat will definitely get in the way. Let me show you how to change this and stop hating yourself, so you can move forward. Peacefully.

Make sure you get your FREE copy of my BOOK, Clearing Your Path to Permanent Weight Loss. Get it here: http://www.weightlossmadereal.com/book

If you are ready to take your weight loss and eating issues to the next level, it’s time to talk with me. Visit http://www.weightlossmadereal.com/talk for a free consultation with Cookie and find out if coaching is the solution to your struggle.

I’d so appreciate it if you would leave me an honest rating and review on iTunes at http://realweightlossrealwomen.com/itunes. It will help the show and its ranking in iTunes a lot! How to rate and review on iTunes: http://realweightlossrealwomen.com/rate. Thank you and enjoy the show!

The Self-Compassion Diet

Wednesday, March 16th, 2016

Self-CompassionA while back, a friend sent me an article she thought I might be interested in. It still stands out in my mind.

It was from the New York Times, in the Health section, written by Tara Parker-Pope, entitled Go Easy on Yourself, A New Wave of Research Urges”.

The article talked about self-compassion as a critical ingredient needed for happiness, self-esteem, easy weight loss, and just about everything we all wish for in our vision of a good life.

It cites research from the recently released book, The Self-Compassion Diet, by Jean Fain.

So, what is self-compassion?

Well, you know the old Golden Rule? Always treats others as you want to be treated yourself.

This is a modification of that rule: Always treat yourself as well as you treat others.

It may be, for many of us, the missing ingredient in getting ourselves to reach our goals.

As I read through the article and the many comments it sparked, I noticed how many people felt that self-compassion was something we had enough of. Time to toughen up and do what you need to do.

But others disagreed.

One of the comments on this article was from a woman who said: “No one in the world hates me more than I hate myself”.

So let me ask you: If you make a mistake, do you berate yourself before moving on and correcting the mistake?

Are you afraid you’ll be a worse mother, a heavier woman, a less efficient worker if you are nice to yourself?

What is self-compassion?

  • It’s seeing yourself without judgment, without disappointment or disapproval.
  • It’s seeing your true self with clarity and honesty, and still feeling love for yourself.
  • It’s being able to accept flaws in yourself without condemning.

If self-compassion feels so good, why even debate it?

Why don’t we all have busloads of self-compassion all the time?

It’s because we fear that if we aren’t harsh and critical, we’ll just go off the deep end.

Become a total sloth.

Be unproductive.

Gain 50 pounds.

Lose all our motivation.

But here’s the deal: Being compassionate toward yourself is not the same as feeling sorry for yourself. Feeling sorry for yourself keeps you stuck. Feeling compassion is like putting a cozy blanket of comfort around you, and saying, ‘You’re ok’.

It doesn’t hold us back from our best work, or from our best self, or from our best habits.

It fills our cups, letting us move forward.

It’s always easier and feels better when we move from a place of love, and understanding.

Comforted.

Full.

Not needing to fill ourselves up with things that don’t quite do the trick.

Like brownies, when you’re lonely.

And chips when you’re overwhelmed.

So, what’s the trick to feeling self-compassion?

  • When something goes wrong, pretend that your most beloved friend was responsible, instead of you. How would you talk to her?
  • When you are doing something that isn’t in your best interests, rise above the scene. Look down at yourself on the ground. And remind yourself of your big game plan.
  • When things aren’t perfect, remind yourself that you’re not alone. We’re all human, we’re all in this together, and we certainly all screw up. So there.

Self-compassion.

Sounds good to me.

Ep 9 Master Your Weight Loss: Get Yourself To Do the Right Thing

Tuesday, March 1st, 2016

Ep 9 Master Your Weight Loss: Get Yourself To Do the Right Thing

Self Discipline Podcast 9

If having self-discipline sounds like the most boring, toughest thing you can do, and don’t want to do, then you need to listen to today’s podcast. When you think of self-discipline as the most loving thing you can do for yourself, you’ll be taking care of yourself on a whole new level.

Make sure you get your FREE copy of my BOOK, Clearing Your Path to Permanent Weight Loss. Get it here: http://www.weightlossmadereal.com/book

Here’s what you’ll learn in Episode 9:

  • Why you rebel against disciplining yourself.
  • What self-discipline really means, and what you mistakenly think it means.
  • How can you make self-discipline feel good?
  • What does it look like in your everyday life?
  • How can you create it in relation to your eating?
  • What steps do you need to take to make it feel easy and natural?
  • And how can you bring self-discipline into your life without dread and resentment?

All these questions are answered in this episode and more. Saying ‘no’ or ‘wait’ to yourself doesn’t feel as bad or challenging when you know why you’re doing it. The goal isn’t to force yourself to do what’s right for you, but to want to do what’s right for you. It’s all about creating rules for yourself that feel like love, not pain, and not hate.

If you are ready to take your weight loss and eating issues to the next level, it’s time to talk with me. Visit http://www.weightlossmadereal.com/talk for a free consultation with Cookie and find out if coaching is the solution to your struggle.

I’d be grateful if you could leave me an honest rating and review on iTunes at http://realweightlossrealwomen.com/itunes. It will help the show and its ranking in iTunes a lot! How to rate and review on iTunes: http://realweightlossrealwomen.com/rate. Thank you and enjoy the show!

Why Being Your Best Matters

Wednesday, March 25th, 2015

Be The Best Version Of YouDid you ever hear artists or writers talk about their ‘body of work’?

It’s what they create, what they contribute to the world during their lifetime.

I’m not an artist. But I do consider that I have a responsibility to my body of work.

What’s my body of work?

It’s me. My life.

All that I am.

Because all that I am profoundly affects those I am connected with.

I believe that my life matters.

It’s the vehicle from which I contribute to the world.

And my contribution is important.

Your contribution is important too.

Maybe you’re not sure exactly what your contribution is.

Nevertheless, it exists.

Just by being in this world, you are having an effect on all people and things you come into contact with.

So the way I like to look at it, is that YOU are your body of work.

You.

Your brain, your ideas, your feelings, and your physical being.

You house the essence of you.

And you owe it to the world to be your best.

So if you feel like it doesn’t matter what you do, or whether you take care of yourself or not, or that being your best isn’t worth the effort, you are wrong, my friend.

You are your body of work, and it all matters.

What do you want to work on to be your best?

What Do You See When You Look in the Mirror?

Thursday, May 31st, 2012

Woman looks in the mirrorWhen I ask my friends and clients this question, their answers vary.

They vary based on how they are feeling that moment.

If they are feeling pretty good about themselves, they generally like what they see. Even if they have a few extra pounds on them, their focus is on what they like. They notice their hair, their sparkling eyes, their posture, and their cute outfit.

If they are in the midst of a war with themselves, their focus goes right to a ‘problem’ area… they focus on their muffin top, their thighs, or their full face.

Did you ever notice that when you are feeling good, everything feels right. You get dressed and put together for the day, and you’re generally happy with what you see.

The very next day, however, could be a totally different story. Same person. Same life. Same body. And yet on the next day, you could be putting all your focus on every possible perceived flaw you have. And what you put your focus on grows.

So what are we saying here?

How could you be happy with how you look one day and not happy, in fact miserable, the very next day?

You don’t change in one day.

But your thoughts change constantly.

And it’s your thoughts that need to be cleaned up before you make any changes in your physical body.

Look in the mirror and notice what comes up.

If you feel good about what you see, don’t stop there.

Dig a little deeper and unearth the thoughts you are thinking that are making you feel good.

What are they?

If you bring them to the surface, and collect them, you can bring them out again on a day when you’re struggling a bit.

And on the days when nothing feels or looks right, bring up those thoughts too. Only these thoughts we won’t be collecting.

We’ll be reviewing them. Seeing if they make the cut. Will you be keeping these thoughts?

Perhaps not.

Only thoughts that make you feel good are allowed.

The image in the mirror doesn’t change overnight.

Your thoughts do.

And the good news is, you’re in charge of your thoughts. So what you need might not be a diet, or a new outfit, or a personal trainer.

Perhaps what you need is a bunch of kinder thoughts.

And remember this about mirrors:

Mirrors give us back a reflection of what we are putting out there.

That includes our thoughts and our feelings.

That explains why we can feel good about what we see in the mirror one day and not good the very next day.

Return those crappy thoughts and pull out the good ones.

After all, you’d return pants that weren’t flattering, right?

Why Does It Have to Take So Long?

Thursday, March 29th, 2012

Why Does It Take So LongOne of the most common things I hear from my clients is, ‘Why is it so slow?’

Why does weight loss take so long?

Here’s the simple answer:

When you do the work needed for real, lasting weight loss, your results will come in three stages.

First, you’ll learn to think in a totally different way.

You’ll stop going to food to solve a problem.

Unless the problem is hunger.

This is mindset work.

It will give you shifts in how you deal with life.

After the mindset shifts, the next stage you’ll go through will be changes in how you eat.

Once you do the mindset work, the changes in your eating will flow naturally.

And last, after mindset changes…

After eating changes…

comes weight loss.

The extra weight you’ve accumulated now has no reason to stay.

Your thinking has changed.

The cause of your overeating is disconnected.

So your eating changes.

And last, so does your weight.

It’s not really taking too long.

It’s perfectly on time.