Posts Tagged ‘eating to hide feelings’

Are You Greedy For More?

Tuesday, March 7th, 2017

Greedy womanSometimes, when I’m eating something really delicious, I have a hard time stopping. I was hungry when I started, and I thoroughly enjoyed what I ate, and now, well, I want to keep going.

Has this ever happened to you?

Sometimes, stopping brings up our issues.

Do we feel like we never have enough?

Enough love, money, food, connections?

Do we want to keep eating to avoid thinking about something?

Or feeling something?

Or doing something?

I’m sure you’ve been there.

But how about when you want to keep eating because it tastes so absolutely yummy?

I’ve been noticing myself doing that lately.

The one piece of chocolate becomes two or three.

The two little gummy bears are so good. I have to go back for more.

Well, here’s the deal.

Sometimes there isn’t necessarily an issue.

Sometimes we are just greedy for more of something good.

Often, we’re so stingy with ourselves, that we rarely give ourselves a treat.

Especially if we’re trying to lose weight.

And when we finally give ourselves a taste of something purely for pleasure, it’s tough to stop. We may feel overwhelmed by the pleasure of it.

So maybe sometimes, when we can’t stop, we’re just being greedy.

I don’t mean that you should use this thought to beat yourself up with. Or to use as evidence that there’s something wrong with you.

There isn’t.

But, even though something is delicious, doesn’t mean we should just roll over and keep eating it.

After all, we’re in charge of ourselves.

And while once in a while going overboard feels great, if we do it regularly, it won’t feel good.

Nor will it give us the results we’re looking for.

So if you’ve been feeling a little greedy lately, and there isn’t a life theme or big emotional issue driving you, here’s what you can do:

Take yourself by the hand, and lead yourself away from the gummies. Do what’s in your best interest. Resist being greedy just to be greedy.

When something tastes fabulous, watch your next thought.

The fact that it tastes great isn’t a command.

It’s just an observation.

This tastes unbelievable! I love it! It’s great!

Period.

The next thought does not have to be: ‘And I must have more’.

Just consider that even after observing how delicious something is, your next thought can be, ‘so what!’

Don’t create a command for yourself.

Enjoy, and step back.

There’s always next time.

Episode 59: The Absolute Worst Thing You Can Eat if You Want to Lose Weight

Tuesday, February 14th, 2017

Episode 59: The Absolute Worst Thing You Can Eat if You Want to Lose Weight

Do you wish someone could just give you the magic key to the kingdom and tell you what to eat?

Worst to eat podcast 59

How much of your life does binge eating consume? If you want your life back, we know exactly what you need to do. And, you can do this. Find out more here.

So many of my clients want just that. They don’t want to work, they just want the answer to the lifelong question: What do I have to do to lose weight?

Is that your question, too?

If it is, here is the answer: Eat like a naturally slim woman.

Manage your mind and your emotions so you don’t eat your feelings. And learn how to take the best care of yourself.

That’s right. The basics.

If your next response is: I already know that, then this coaching session is perfect for you.

Join me as I lead you in a brief coaching session and show you why the basics work and how you might be sabotaging yourself without realizing it.

I will see you inside!

Make sure you get your FREE copy of my BOOK, Clearing Your Path to Permanent Weight Loss, plus other gifts. Get them here: http://weightlossmadereal.com/gifts

THE FREEDOM COACHING GROUP: If you’ve ever dreamed about having your own personal coach to work on your eating with you, you’re closer than you think. My coaching group is happening now! It’s super affordable, supportive, and an amazing resource if you struggle with overeating, emotional eating or binge eating. Take all you’re learning here on the podcast and go to the next level. Click here: http://weightlossmadereal.com/group to get all the details and join our group Weight Loss Made Real: The Freedom Group. Because really, isn’t freedom what we all want? I hope to see you in the group!

If you are ready to take your weight loss and eating issues to the next level, it’s time to talk with me. Visit http://www.weightlossmadereal.com/talk for a free consultation with Cookie and find out if private coaching is the solution to your struggle.

I always welcome your letters. You may email me at cookie@realweightlossrealwomen.com

I’d so appreciate it if you would leave me an honest rating and review on iTunes at http://realweightlossrealwomen.com/itunes. It will help the show and its ranking in iTunes a lot! How to rate and review on iTunes: http://realweightlossrealwomen.com/rate. Thank you and enjoy the show!

Ep 43 Emotional Eating: Why You Need to Feel ALL Your Feelings

Tuesday, October 25th, 2016

Episode 43: Emotional Eating: Why You Need to Feel ALL Your Feelings

Are you selective about what you let yourself feel? I’m talking about your emotions.

Sad, happy, worried, angry or lonely. The good and the bad.

Feelings podcast 43

Do you distract yourself from an uncomfortable feeling by eating? When you do that, you avoid a feeling and add some extra pounds to your body.

Join me today in this coaching session and you’ll learn:

  • What a feeling is and how it’s created.
  • What your thoughts have to do with your feelings.
  • Why you may have learned to avoid any negative emotion.
  • And speaking of painful emotions, are they clean pain from the nature of being alive? Or are they feelings made much worse by the stories you tell yourself?
  • It’s important to allow yourself to feel the natural, unavoidable pain of being alive. Here’s why.
  • Do you know what happens when you avoid your negative feelings?
  • And, what happens when you allow yourself to feel everything?
  • And finally, how to do it. How to feel everything and survive.

Managing your emotional life is a sign of being an adult. You can do this. And when you learn to do this, there is nothing to run from, and you will lose the drive to eat when you aren’t hungry.

I will see you in the session!

THE FREEDOM COACHING GROUP: If you’ve ever dreamed about having your own personal coach to work on your eating with you, you’re closer than you think. My coaching group is happening now! It’s super affordable, supportive, and an amazing resource if you struggle with overeating, emotional eating or binge eating. Take all you’re learning here on the podcast and go to the next level. Click here: http://weightlossmadereal.com/group to get all the details and join our group Weight Loss Made Real: The Freedom Group. Because really, isn’t freedom what we all want? I hope to see you in the group!

Make sure you get your FREE copy of my BOOK, Clearing Your Path to Permanent Weight Loss, plus other gifts. Get them here: http://weightlossmadereal.com/gifts

If you are ready to take your weight loss and eating issues to the next level, it’s time to talk with me. Visit http://www.weightlossmadereal.com/talk for a free consultation with Cookie and find out if coaching is the solution to your struggle.

I always welcome your letters. You may email me at cookie@realweightlossrealwomen.com

I’d so appreciate it if you would leave me an honest rating and review on iTunes at http://realweightlossrealwomen.com/itunes. It will help the show and its ranking in iTunes a lot! How to rate and review on iTunes: http://realweightlossrealwomen.com/rate. Thank you and enjoy the show!

Ep 42 Stop Your Stress Eating, Part 2

Tuesday, October 18th, 2016

Episode 42: Stop Your Stress Eating, Part 2

I’m back with part 2 of Stress Eating, to help you disconnect your stressful emotions from eating without hunger.

Stress Eating Podcast 42

If you listened to Episode 40, you’ll remember that we talked about your stress eating.

We defined it, looked at the mind-body connection and really pinpointed how it shows up in your life.

Now, we’re going to unravel exactly what to do to break the connection between emotions and eating.

Today, in your coaching session, we will cover:

  • What your thoughts are that lead to stress.
  • What the effects might be if you don’t learn how to disconnect stress from eating.
  • How to deal with the experience of stress in the moment, and not eat.
  • Stepping back, looking at your thoughts, the cause of your stress.
  • And, rising above and seeing the big picture. How to create a life where stress is minimized, and you learn to manage your emotions on a daily basis without eating.

I hope you join me for this revealing coaching session!

THE FREEDOM COACHING GROUP: If you’ve ever dreamed about having your own personal coach to work on your eating with you, you’re closer than you think. My coaching group is happening now! It’s super affordable, supportive, and an amazing resource if you struggle with overeating, emotional eating or binge eating. Take all you’re learning here on the podcast and go to the next level. Click here: http://weightlossmadereal.com/group to get all the details and join our group Weight Loss Made Real: The Freedom Group. Because really, isn’t freedom what we all want? I hope to see you in the group!

Make sure you get your FREE copy of my BOOK, Clearing Your Path to Permanent Weight Loss, plus other gifts. Get them here: http://weightlossmadereal.com/gifts

If you are ready to take your weight loss and eating issues to the next level, it’s time to talk with me. Visit http://www.weightlossmadereal.com/talk for a free consultation with Cookie and find out if coaching is the solution to your struggle.

I always welcome your letters. You may email me at cookie@realweightlossrealwomen.com

I’d so appreciate it if you would leave me an honest rating and review on iTunes at http://realweightlossrealwomen.com/itunes. It will help the show and its ranking in iTunes a lot! How to rate and review on iTunes: http://realweightlossrealwomen.com/rate. Thank you and enjoy the show!

Put On Some Socks!

Thursday, October 13th, 2016

I have to admit it; I love Raymond.Put on some socks

I mean, I love ‘Everybody Loves Raymond’.

Every single corny, over-watched, laugh-tracked episode.

With the familiar characters that almost everyone can find some version of in their own families.

It makes me laugh.

So a few nights ago, I watched as Debra and Ray were seeing their priest for some pre-marital counseling.

It seems that Ray was getting a little nervous before taking his vows, and wanted to make sure that Debra really loved him. He worried that in reality, maybe she was a little out of his league.

Well, my favorite line was when Debra yelled at Ray, “I don’t care if you’ve got cold feet. Put on some socks!”

And it made me think: maybe that’s what we all need.

A good old kick in the butt.

A reminder that a little fear isn’t the end.

Do what you need to do and get over it.

So of course I think about my dear clients.

They are brave and smart.

They figuratively climb mountains all the time in their life.

And sometimes they get scared.

But scared doesn’t mean stop.

It means getting help.

It means looking at your thoughts and questioning their validity.

It means tweaking what you are doing.

But it never means, “Stop! Turn around, and go back down that mountain…”

It simply means, “Put on some socks!”

Ep 41 Weight Loss and the Working Woman

Tuesday, October 11th, 2016

Episode 41: Weight Loss and the Working Woman

Are you a woman who works? Maybe you work managing your family, from morning until night. Or perhaps you’re a working woman in an office setting, employed by a company.

Either way, join the ranks. You’re a working woman.

Working Woman Podcast 41

And having seen this in many of my private clients, I would guess there is a real disconnect between who you are all day long, and who you become at night.

Do you hold all things together all day long, only to lapse into emotional eating at the end of the day?

Let me ask you these questions:

Are you aware of the many admirable traits you possess, operating in the world and solving problems all day long?

Have you ever thought about why you’re able to do this and then come home and feel helpless around food at night?

Let me show you a simple perspective shift. I want you to see your skills and use those skills to solve your own personal problem: emotional eating.

  • I will coach you and show you how your day differs from your night.
  • What you’re not seeing about yourself.
  • Why you don’t use your problem solving skills on yourself personally.
  • How to view your emotional eating as a simple project to be taken care of.
  • How to ace this project.
  • What creates the perfect storm in the evening.
  • And what to focus on for the next week.

Together we can figure this out.

I will see you in the coaching session.

THE FREEDOM COACHING GROUP: If you’ve ever dreamed about having your own personal coach to work on your eating with you, you’re closer than you think. My coaching group is happening now! It’s super affordable, supportive, and an amazing resource if you struggle with overeating, emotional eating or binge eating. Take all you’re learning here on the podcast and go to the next level. Click here: http://weightlossmadereal.com/group to get all the details and join our group Weight Loss Made Real: The Freedom Group. Because really, isn’t freedom what we all want? I hope to see you in the group!

Make sure you get your FREE copy of my BOOK, Clearing Your Path to Permanent Weight Loss, plus other gifts. Get them here: http://weightlossmadereal.com/gifts

If you are ready to take your weight loss and eating issues to the next level, it’s time to talk with me. Visit http://www.weightlossmadereal.com/talk for a free consultation with Cookie and find out if coaching is the solution to your struggle.

I always welcome your letters. You may email me at cookie@realweightlossrealwomen.com

I’d so appreciate it if you would leave me an honest rating and review on iTunes at http://realweightlossrealwomen.com/itunes. It will help the show and its ranking in iTunes a lot! How to rate and review on iTunes: http://realweightlossrealwomen.com/rate. Thank you and enjoy the show!

Ep 40 Why You Overeat When You’re Stressed

Tuesday, October 4th, 2016

Episode 40: Why You Overeat When You’re Stressed

If you’re alive, you have stress. If you have a job, some friends, or maybe some obligations, you have stress.

Stressed Podcast 40

We all have stress in some form or another, and yet we don’t all eat in reaction to it.

Today, I’m going to talk to you about stress and your eating. Or, your overeating, that is.

Do you even know exactly what stress is?

Let’s talk about it and I will show you:

  • What stress is.
  • How it shows up in your life, in your mind and your body.
  • Why you might overeat when you’re feeling stressed.
  • How eating got connected with your moods.
  • What exactly is the mind-body connection?
  • Does eating help you when you’re stressed?
  • Why do some people eat from stress while others lose their appetites?
  • Do you know what your stress eating patterns are?
  • How to stop the habit of overeating when life is too much.
  • Is the goal to eliminate all stress from your life? (Hint: no.)

So we’re going to take a look at what you do when life feels like too much to deal with and the feeling of overwhelm is high.

Is eating inevitable? No.

Join me in this coaching session to learn to recognize your own stress eating patterns and start the process of disconnecting food from mood.

I’ll see you in the session.

THE FREEDOM COACHING GROUP: If you’ve ever dreamed about having your own personal coach to work on your eating with you, you’re closer than you think. My coaching group is happening now! It’s super affordable, supportive, and an amazing resource if you struggle with overeating, emotional eating or binge eating. Take all you’re learning here on the podcast and go to the next level. Click here: http://weightlossmadereal.com/group to get all the details and join our group Weight Loss Made Real: The Freedom Group. Because really, isn’t freedom what we all want? I hope to see you in the group!

Make sure you get your FREE copy of my BOOK, Clearing Your Path to Permanent Weight Loss, plus other gifts. Get them here: http://weightlossmadereal.com/gifts

If you are ready to take your weight loss and eating issues to the next level, it’s time to talk with me. Visit http://www.weightlossmadereal.com/talk for a free consultation with Cookie and find out if coaching is the solution to your struggle.

I always welcome your letters. You may email me at cookie@realweightlossrealwomen.com

I’d so appreciate it if you would leave me an honest rating and review on iTunes at http://realweightlossrealwomen.com/itunes. It will help the show and its ranking in iTunes a lot! How to rate and review on iTunes: http://realweightlossrealwomen.com/rate. Thank you and enjoy the show!

Stop Running From Discomfort

Thursday, July 14th, 2016

Mother_DaughterXSmall-300x199Recently I found myself in an old familiar setting.

One of my teenage daughters had come home from school in a mood. Let’s just say, it was one of those teenage moods.

I was in the kitchen with her, and suddenly realized that I was mindlessly snacking.

I did a quick check-in with myself.

No hunger.

And I realized that just like that I had slipped into an old pattern… I started to feel uncomfortable and immediately started eating to remedy the discomfort.

Although most of that behavior is gone for me, it still occasionally rears its head.

And it’s good to notice that even after doing lots of work, sometimes you react with old patterns.

So here’s the story:

When you begin to feel uncomfortable, about anything you’re thinking about, notice the feeling coming over you.

Pause.

And then welcome the discomfort.

It’s here to teach you something.

To give you the inside path to your thoughts.

And only after you allow yourself to feel the feeling, can you go inside and work on it. Change it. Or not.

But first you have to feel it.

Then you can figure out what’s going on.

If you eat you will smother the feeling, and lose touch with the thought.

So grab the opportunity.

Stop running from discomfort.

Have You Plateaued?

Thursday, June 23rd, 2016

plateauThe dictionary defines plateau as: to reach a state of little or no growth or decline, to stop increasing or progressing, or to remain at a stable level of achievement.

To many of my clients, the word plateau is a dreaded word.

It implies lack of movement, specifically movement towards their most desired goal… weight loss.

In your career, you might look at the level you’ve reached in your organization, wanting to move up and feeling stymied where you are.

In a relationship, a love relationship, think of the woman who believes all things should keep moving forward.

Toward marriage.

And perhaps her partner is happy to stay where he is.

When this stability happens, and we’re not where we envision ending up, we brainstorm and plan to ‘attack’ this plateau… bust through it, conquer it, and FORCE some movement.

But what if a plateau was a good thing?

What if a plateau was a gift?

Why not look at this lack of movement as a chance to regroup, to assess where you are, and to review where you want to go?

And just be there.

In the plateau.

Maybe it’s a time to get used to the movement you’ve already made.

Maybe it’s a time to breathe in your progress so far.

To make it a part of you.

Your new normal.

And from this new normal, more change may be possible.

I think, when you’re making changes and growing, whether it’s your body or your relationships, you make these changes in steps.

And when you plateau, you’ve reached a step.

Instead of panicking and beating yourself forward, stop.

Just stop and be where you are.

From this point, from this peaceful place, you can decide.

To change your actions.

To think differently about your goals.

Maybe even to change your goals.

Maybe you will decide to keep moving forward.

Maybe not.

The plateau is the universe’s way of saying to us, “Pause. You’re at this stage of your evolution. Take it in. Then you can decide.”

Why Overeating Leads to More Overeating

Thursday, May 26th, 2016

Overeating and OverwhelmedWhat triggers you to eat more than your body wants?

It all starts with a thought.

That thought leads us to a feeling, good or bad, it doesn’t matter.

And that feeling leads us to take action.

When we take action, we get a result.

Overeat often, and the result you’ll get is extra weight.

This is basic Cognitive Behavioral Psychology.

Now picture this scenario: you have eaten past hunger, past comfort.

Physically you feel overstuffed and uncomfortable.

Your emotional feeling might be something like shame, regret, depression, anger, or hopelessness.

All of those feelings come from your thoughts.

So after you overeat, as soon as you start to feel these negative emotions, you feel uneasy.

As these bad feelings begin to arise, resistance also arises. You don’t want to feel shame or depression or hopelessness.

So, what’s a girl to do?

Eat more.

Overeating begets more overeating because of what we say to ourselves.

When we start beating ourselves, our survival instinct kicks in and we want relief.

We want it now.

We want to feel better.

How can we do this?

The easiest way to drown out a bad feeling if overeating is your modus operandi, is to overeat some more. (If you overspend, or overdrink, or over-anything, your M.O. will be to do more of the same.)

And this cycle can go on and on until you are really physically ill.

After we overeat, we commonly think, “Oh well, I blew it, I may as well keep going and enjoy this food and start again tomorrow.”

I think there’s more to “I blew it” than meets the eye.

After you ‘blew it’, do you really enjoy what you are continuing to eat?

Really?

“I blew it” implies you goofed, and now you may as well give up.

I say “I blew it” is a cover for “I can’t stand this discomfort one moment longer. I need food.”

So you eat.

And now you can focus your thoughts and your energy on what you just ate, how you blew your program again, and what’s wrong with you. Mostly what’s wrong with you.

It’s a never ending cycle.

Sounds crappy.

Feels crappy.

Imagine this: next time you overeat, and you’ve completed the first round of food, just sit. Get away from the food, and set a timer for 15 minutes. See what you feel. Notice what you’re thinking. (Here’s a worksheet to help you do this… click here to open.)

But here’s the deal: don’t go to your usual feeling-squasher. Sit with it. Let it pass though you. Here’s where you have the power to stop. To turn things around.

You don’t have to complete this overeating episode in the way you always do. You can break the chains that bind you any time.

What if you completely changed your perspective?

Instead of thinking that you boarding a fast-moving train and can’t get off, think of this:

You overate.

But it’s what you do after that will pack on the pounds of shame. Dr. Stephen Gullo, a diet guru to New York City high society, calls it the ‘slip to sleep syndrome’.

After your first slip, your first bite of something you didn’t have hunger for, your first phase of overeating, if you stop, you can minimize the damage to your psyche. Not to mention your body.

But what most of us do is continue the damage until we go to bed that night, bloated and wounded, adding insult to self-injury.

You’ve never blown it.

What does ‘blown it’ mean, anyway?